"Fine" Dining

Michael Ornelas
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"Fine" Dining

Comedian Michael Ornelas dives deep into the stories behind your favorite chain restaurants like Cracker Barrel, McDonald's, and Chili's before reviewing them with a new guest each week in search of the perfect 5-out-of-10 "fine" dining experience.

  1. 15 HR AGO

    Chili's IS the Most Mediocre Restaurant in America

    🌶️ Chili’s IS the Most Mediocre Restaurant in America (Part 2) 🌶️ After 100 restaurant reviews, this was it. Chili’s officially earned the perfect 5.00 out of 10, making it the most mediocre restaurant in America — the ultimate point of comparison for every meal to come. In this episode, I’m joined by returning guest VyVy Nguyen as we review the Encino location in full detail. From booth battles and dry wings to nostalgic chips and a molten dessert that hides its magic in the middle, we break down the exact moment Chili’s became the standard of mid. 🍔 The Sliders That Carried the Triple Dipper 🌽 Corn Is Good: A Re-Discovering 🔥 Nashville Hot Wings That Were Neither Hot nor Wet 🚽 Surprisingly Clean Saturday Night Bathroom 🌶️ Booths Designed for a Quiet Turf War 😑 The Most Just-There Fries You've Ever Had 🎂 A Birthday Song False Start for the Ages RAP MUSIC VIDEO DEBUT toward the end of the episode: "I Want My Baby Back" 💬 COMMENT BELOW: Is Chili’s your go-to for a safe, middle-of-the-road meal? Or has it slipped into soggy nostalgia? 📢 SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: 🔥 Patreon (Bonus reviews & exclusive content!): https://www.patreon.com/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Chat chains & share horror stories!): https://discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch full episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@finediningpodcast 🔗 All links: www.linktree.com/finediningpodcast ⚖️ Like, Subscribe & Share to spread the gospel of perfect mediocrity. Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van 👉 NEXT WEEK: A new chapter begins. The Chili’s Test is born. First up: Papa Johns. 🍕   "I Want My Baby Back" Written & Performed by Michael Ornelas featuring VyVy Nguyen Produced by Fresh Kils & Myer Clarity Mixed & Mastered by Fresh Kils Video Shot & Edited by Steven Zurita

    1h 15m

  2. 30 APR

    Chili's: The Fajita Effect, NSYNC, and the Jingle That Changed Everything

    🌶️ Chili’s: They Started in a Post Office?? 🌶️ Chili’s. For nearly 50 years, it’s been slinging margaritas, sizzling skillets, and vibes that are somehow both flirty and corporate. In this episode, actress and podcast 3-timers guest club VyVy Nguyen is back to explore the surprisingly spicy history of this chain restaurant icon with me — from its post office origins to its entanglement with The Office, N*SYNC, and the internet’s horniest Vine. Was Chili’s always this unhinged, just waiting for us to notice? 🌮 The “Fajita Effect”: Why One Order Sets the Whole Restaurant Off 🎶 Baby Back Ribs & the Jingle That Haunts Your Soul 📬 From Post Office to Powerhouse — How Chili’s Mailed It In and Still Won America Over 🍹 Margarita Madness: 13 Swimming Pools Worth a Year 🤖 The Vine That Chili's Declared One of its Most Important Moments Ever 📺 Jim & Pam’s First Kiss Was Where?! 😳 N*SYNC Gets Crushed by a Crate (But Harmonizes First) 🍽️ Chili’s Triple Dipper: A Flight of Fried Foods for the Indecisive Diner 🍽️ 💬 COMMENT BELOW: What’s your favorite Chili’s menu item? Or is it all about the vibe (and the molten lava cake)? 📢 SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: 🔥 Patreon (Bonus reviews & exclusive content!): https://www.patreon.com/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Chat chains & share horror stories!): https://discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch full episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@finediningpodcast 🔗 All links: www.linktree.com/finediningpodcast ⚡ Like, Subscribe & Share if you crave deep dives into food, freakiness & fried mediocrity! Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van 👉 NEXT WEEK: We review a Saturday night at Chili’s. Chaos at Encino's hottest table to try and find the perfect 5.00 out of 10.

    49 min

  3. 23 APR

    Is Joe's Crab Shack the Best Chain Seafood Restaurant?

    🦞 Joe’s Crab Shack (Part 2): Heavenly Shrimp, Sloppy Lob, & Dessert Scores 11 out of 10 🦞 After diving into the shady past of Joe’s Crab Shack, it was finally time to eat. In this episode, I head to the Disney-adjacent location with friend and podcast voiceover contributor Sandy Rose to see if the crab still holds up. From shockingly great coconut shrimp to a fish filet that straight-up betrayed us, we cover every bite, every bathroom handle, and every s’more-stained moment in our quest to determine if Joe’s is truly the perfectly mediocre restaurant. Is Joe’s Crab Shack a crustacean celebration? Or just chaos in a cowboy hat? 🍤 Jumbo Coconut Shrimp That Changed Sandy’s Life 🐟 Fried Fish So Bad It Made Us Question Reality 🍰 Campfire S'mores Dessert – Sugar, Fire, and Too Much Cake 🧼 Bathroom Handles & Sauce-Covered Soap Dispensers 🧂 Captain’s Sauce: A Flavor Bomb or Suicide Mission? 🥔 The Cajun Platter That Made One of Us Cry (Almost) 🧃 Coleslaw, Cucumber Salad & My First-Ever Hard-Boiled Egg 👯‍♀️ Where Were the Dancing Servers?! 💬 COMMENT BELOW: Is Joe's the best seafood in chain restaurant dining? 📢 SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: 🔥 Patreon (Bonus reviews & exclusive content!): https://www.patreon.com/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Chat chains & share horror stories!): https://discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch full episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@finediningpodcast 🔗 All links: www.linktree.com/finediningpodcast ⚡ Like, Subscribe & Share if you love chaotic deep dives into fast-casual dining! Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van 👉 NEXT WEEK: I’m hitting up the restaurant that started it all. Chili’s. Could it finally be the perfect 5.00? 🌶️

    1h 4m

  4. 16 APR

    Joe's Crab Shack: Drunk Toddlers, Racist Decor, & WHO THE HELL IS JOE

    Joe’s Crab Shack has been serving seafood and sass since 1991 — but who is Joe? In this week’s episode, I dig deep into the murky origins of this kitschy crustacean-themed chain, uncovering mystery, missteps, and marketing that somehow works. From accidentally boozed-up babies to scandalous decorations and trans fat deception, Joe’s has made some serious waves. Plus, I’m joined by longtime friend and podcast voice Sandy Rose to question whether you can truly trust a restaurant that sells shirts saying “I’ve Got Crabs.” Is Joe’s just a goofy seafood joint? Or a case study in chaotic chain dining gone rogue? 🦐 Who is Joe? And why can’t we find him? 🕺 Dancing Servers & Shark Mocktails Gone Horribly Wrong 🚫 The No-Tipping Policy That Sunk Morale 💀 The Lynching Photo That Sparked Outrage 🧈 Trans Fat Lies (and Why They Were So Tasty) 👕 Merch Madness: Peace, Love & Crabs 📉 From 130+ Locations to Just 20 Today 🏝️ Sandy Rose’s Holiday-Themed Restaurant Pitch 💬 COMMENT BELOW: Have you eaten at Joe’s Crab Shack? Did your waiter dance or just bring you trauma? 📢 SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: 🔥 Patreon (Bonus reviews & exclusive content!): https://www.patreon.com/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Chat chains & share horror stories!): https://discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch full episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@finediningpodcast 🔗 All links: www.linktree.com/finediningpodcast ⚡ Like, Subscribe & Share if you love deep dives into crabby chaos! 👉 NEXT WEEK: We ate at Joe’s. Was it all kitsch and crabs — or something much weirder? Stay tuned. 🪝

    44 min
  5. Panera Bread Is a Pastry Paradise

    9 APR

    Panera Bread Is a Pastry Paradise

    We finally ate at Panera Bread — and while the bakery items impressed, the rest of the experience was a chaotic medley of kiosk confusion, bathroom code injustice, and raw onion overload. I’m joined once again by Lyss Johnson (comedian, friend, and former Panera employee) as we break down every detail of our in-person visit to the iconic soup-slinging, salad-stacking chain. Can the cinnamon crunch bagel save this spot from mediocrity? Or is Panera coasting on vibes and vending machine tech? 🥯 The Cinnamon Crunch Bagel That Nearly Ruined Our Lives (In a Good Way) 🍲 Fireside Chili in a Bread Bowl That Got Weirdly Placental 📟 Ordering Kiosk Nightmares and the Case of the Disappearing French Dip 🚽 Bathroom Codes Are Inhumane – Let the People Pee 🍪 The Cookie That Made Us Chipper (and Maybe Changed Our Lives) 🎨 Lettuce Art, Cucky Murals, and Farmer-Flattering Decor 🎶 Off-Brand Pop Anthems That Broke Our Brains 🐔 Lyss Johnson's Score, a Chicken Bag Horror Story, and the Panera Perverts 💬 JOIN THE DISCUSSION: What’s your Panera go-to? Is the soup worth the struggle? 📢 SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: 🔥 Patreon (Bonus reviews & exclusive content!): https://www.patreon.com/c/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Chat chains & share horror stories!): https://discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch full episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@finediningpodcast 🔗 All links: www.linktree.com/finediningpodcast ⚡ Like, Subscribe & Share if you believe every restaurant deserves a fair trial! Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van 👉 NEXT WEEK: We set sail for Joe’s Crab Shack — nautical nonsense or seafood salvation? 🦀

    53 min
  6. Panera Bread: Infinite Refills, Caffeinated Chaos, and Chicken Controversies

    2 APR

    Panera Bread: Infinite Refills, Caffeinated Chaos, and Chicken Controversies

    🚨 Panera Bread: Infinite Refills, Chicken Fights & Lemonade Lawsuits 🚨 From a humble Missouri bakery to one of the most recognizable fast-casual chains in the country, Panera Bread has been on a wild ride. This week, I dive deep into the breadbasket of chaos that is Panera’s history — including aggressive ad campaigns, billion-dollar innovations, and a beverage scandal that stirred national headlines. Plus, I’m joined by Lyss Johnson — comedian and former Panera employee — to break down what it’s really like behind the counter at America’s favorite soup & salad spot. Was Panera ever really the cozy bread haven we remember? Or has it always been a little bit soup, a little bit shady? 🥖 The $150,000 Loan That Became a $7 Billion Bread Empire 🐔 How Panera's "EZ Chicken" Campaign Offended Farmers Nationwide 📲 The Rise of Panera 2.0 and the iPad-ification of Soup 🍋 Charged Lemonade Controversy – What Actually Happened? 🥤 Unlimited Sip Club: The Most Underrated Beverage Subscription Ever? 🥗 Why Panera’s Vibe Has Changed (and Who It’s Really For Now) 💰 Rising Prices, Declining Quality – Can Panera Still Deliver? 🧓 Lyss Johnson’s Shocking (and Bird-Filled) Walks Home from Panera 💬 COMMENT BELOW: Do you still love Panera? Or is it just overpriced soup in a bread bowl? 📢 SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: 🔥 Patreon (Bonus reviews & exclusive content!): https://www.patreon.com/c/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Chat chains & share horror stories!): https://discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch full episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FineDiningPodcast 🔗 All links: www.linktree.com/finediningpodcast ⚡ Like, Subscribe & Share if you love deep dives into fast-casual chaos! Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van 👉 NEXT WEEK: We’re reviewing Panera Bread in real time — and it’s not the Panera you remember. Stay tuned. 🥣

    43 min
  7. Is Dairy Queen Worth a 2 Hour Drive?

    26 MAR

    Is Dairy Queen Worth a 2 Hour Drive?

    🍦 We Drove 2 Hours for Dairy Queen – Was It Worth It? 🍦 We hit the road and drove nearly two hours to the nearest Dairy Queen Grill & Chill to finally see if there’s more to DQ than just frozen nostalgia. We tried three burgers (including a surprisingly delicious Flamethrower), fries, onion rings, chicken tenders, and two iconic desserts—the Blizzard and the Banana Split. The building looked half-abandoned, the service felt five-star, and the bathroom was designed by David Lynch, apparently. Is Dairy Queen just a dessert destination with a food menu on the side—or is it a true contender for America’s most mediocre chain? Indie filmmaker Tyler Eaton joins me to evaluate! 🎙 IN THIS EPISODE: 🔥 The Flamethrower Burger Actually Brought the Heat (and Flavor) 🍨 The Blizzard: A 10/10 Dessert Worth the Hype 🥶 The Banana Split That Summoned My Grandpa’s Spirit 😬 The Fries and Onion Rings Were… Not It 🚽 A Bathroom So Weird It Deserves Its Own Movie 🥄 Why the Chicken Strips Were the Definition of “Just There” 🏰 DQ Needs to Embrace Its Royal Branding Already! 💬 JOIN THE COMMUNITY & SUPPORT THE SHOW: 🔥 Patreon (Bonus Yelp Reviews & Exclusive Episodes!): https://www.patreon.com/c/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Talk chain restaurants & share horror stories!): https://discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🔗 All links: www.linktree.com/finediningpodcast 🎬 Check out guest Tyler Eaton’s indie horror-comedy Mysterious Ways – coming soon to YouTube, Amazon, Google Play, Apple TV+, and Tubi! 👉 NEXT WEEK: Panera Bread gets the "Fine" Dining treatment. Let's learn all about that lemonade with a body count...

    51 min
  8. Dairy Queen’s Rise to Power – The Blizzard Effect

    19 MAR

    Dairy Queen’s Rise to Power – The Blizzard Effect

    Dairy Queen is more than just ice cream—it was one of the first fast-food chains to take over America. In this episode, we dive into how a self-proclaimed chemist helped perfect soft serve, why DQ dominated the 1950s, and the moment that changed everything: the invention of the Blizzard. Joining me is writer & director Tyler Eaton of the new horror-comedy film Mysterious Ways, as we explore Dairy Queen’s rise, its questionable hot food menu, and whether it still lives up to its legendary status today. 🎙 IN THIS EPISODE: 🍦 How Dairy Queen exploded to 1,400+ locations in just 10 years ❄️ The Blizzard: Can Dairy Queen even take credit for it? 🏁 Did Dairy Queen help spark the fast-food boom in America? 🤔 How did a 14-year-old inspire the most famous upside-down dessert? 🍔 Hear all of DQ's slogans throughout the years! 🎤 Gwen Stefani worked at Dairy Queen?! 📢 JOIN THE COMMUNITY & SUPPORT THE SHOW: 🔥 Patreon (Exclusive bonus content!): https://www.patreon.com/c/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Fast food talk & horror stories!): https://discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FineDiningPodcast 🔗 All links: www.linktree.com/finediningpodcast Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van 👉 NEXT WEEK: We visit Dairy Queen Grill & Chill – Can they actually pull off burgers, or should they just stick to ice cream? 🍔🍦

    48 min
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About

Comedian Michael Ornelas dives deep into the stories behind your favorite chain restaurants like Cracker Barrel, McDonald's, and Chili's before reviewing them with a new guest each week in search of the perfect 5-out-of-10 "fine" dining experience.

Information

  • Creator
    Michael Ornelas
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2025
  • Episodes
    121
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2022
  • Show Website
    "Fine" Dining

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